Monday, November 28, 2011

Black Monday Mandate

I propose that the Monday after Thanksgiving be called Black Monday.  This day rivals January 2 as one of the worst days for going back to work.  You drag your biscuits back to work and all you want to do is close your eyes and take a nap.  We attended a four day eating contest wedding extravaganza that was ab gorg (absolutely gorgeous).  I could show you pics of the beautiful bride or the cuteness of LO but I only snapped one picture.  I didn't bring my camera as I knew that balancing a strapless dress, a baby and five inch heels would push my dexterity to the limit.  So at midnight I snapped a picture of my own vanity.
Sometimes an idea on Tuesday at 5pm seems like a better idea than the actual execution three hours before the wedding starts.   My closest in age first cousin was married  this past weekend.  She was the first baby to be born in my family (both sides) after me and my "first baby."  I remember carrying her and talking about her non-stop.  Every few years I stumble across her as my first subject from my first camera and there are so many pictures of just her--on a swing, on a step, standing.  My creative photo ideas obvs didn't come until later and with a much less willing subject, side eyes LO.  I actually cried when I tried to give a blessing which will surprise all of you that I think I have a cold dead heart, side eyes DH. Her wedding was also the final nail in my coffin of oldness.  When younger people start getting married and it is not inappropriate or a shotgun wedding, you are OLD.

So onto my own vanity, I got clip-in hair extensions.  Ok, now that you have stopped laughing, I will tell you my GOAL.  I wanted to be able to do something pretty or interesting with my hair for the wedding.  I was thinking a little discreet hair to pull back or curl.  I didn't think that I would look like Peggy Bundy with a longer mullet.  Usually you think about these ideas and then you have them cut and try them out BEFORE the big day.  You don't go hours before and expect everything at once from someone you found on YELP.  I left the salon uneasy and she assured me that I JUST needed make-up and I would like them better.  She kept saying they weren't as long as I thought.  I put on makeup and the curl fell out of them and it looked like a terrible wig.  I saw a few pictures yesterday and I wanted to scratch out my own eyes.  After how many years, I have finally figured out that I have a long face that doesn't look good with longer hair.  WHICH IS GREAT because she also cut my hair and cut me bangs.  My usual steely defenses against layers and bangs were broken down by anxiety about running late.  Sigh, at least I can easily forget Hairaster 2011, oh wait it is immortalized FOREVER on video, camera and beyond. 

Spending four days with LO was amazing and we managed a lot of QFT (quality family time).  DH was truly a champ all weekend and a great date.  Being old beats the hell out of sharing a room with older family members that may or may not snore so loudly that sleep is impossible.   Although, I have drawn you a pic of the suite that we had and my pitiful sleeping arrangements.

The amount of attention paid to LO over the weekend bordered on ridiculous and I think she is starting to believe her own hype.  I caught her french kissing herself several times over the weekend.  Also observe the obnoxious bright pink tennis shoes.  After two shoes stores 20 pairs of shoes offered and sighs of resignation from DH, she picked out shoes that look a lot like Dolly's shoes. 

Lastly, one of the cutest things to happen in LO's world this weekend was a Friday night play date with one of her BFFs (other than her own image).  One of LO and my fab mommy and me friends stayed with LO while we attended the rehearsal dinner.  When we came home and it was time to say goodbye, both girls ran up the stairs and sat in the dark next to each other on the same step hiding.   Do you remember doing that as a kid when you didn't want your friend to go home, I melted a bit inside.   Hope your turkey, booze and sugar consumption was high, so we can put a Black Monday nap mandate into effect.