Sunday, February 20, 2011

White Flag is Up

Be warned--This is a somewhat ranty post.  A few months after I gave birth to LO, I started giving my wisdom to other pregnant women.  I would write novels on email on what they really needed, what brands were good and cost saving ideas on strollers, cribs, diapers, wipes, clothes etc.  Sample registries were drawn up as advice and I even advised on how to return horrible gifts to get money to pay for diapers.  I was obsessed that no woman should fall victim to the money hungry baby industry.  I suggested the two books that were essential to any pg woman.  Mayo Clinic Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy and Baby Bargains so you know exactly what is going on and what you need and don't need.  I offered slightly used items so they could try them before buying.

WHY did I bother??!!  I am still attending showers were the mom has registered for so much useless shite.  They buy the angel monitor to protect against SIDS like something sold at Babies R Us is going to really work.  LO got tested for how often she breathed as a newborn due to some of her issues and they told us that she would set the thing off all the time so not to bother with any of that crap.   Is a normal healthy 8 pound baby from an affluent non-smoking house really going to need the angel monitor??  I am thinking that $500 baby comforter and bumpers are going to be a tad more risky!!  The thing that really spun off this rant was baby vitamins on the registry.  Really??!! Do we already know that the infant is lacking iron?

From now on, I am going to advise anyone that bothers to ask that they should definitely get the jumper, swing and bouncy seat with the matching high chair that can be reclined so they can sleep in it ALL before the baby is born.  Why not throw in the exersaucer and walker as well.  Do you need a snap n go, BOB and umbrella stroller plus your Bugaboo? DEFINITELY.  You should also buy some shoes for your newborn and throw in that cashmere onesie in size NB.   And if you haven't started your baby on Mozart in the womb via special earphones, you are screwed.  Snowsuit in CA--why not? Three different thermometers--absolutely essential.  Do you need a $1,500 crib with matching $1,000 dresser and armoire that they will chew on and throw toys at--yes, yes and yes.  Have at it crazy pregnant ladies as I give up.