Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Proud Mama

LO went to the physical therapist on Friday for the diagnosis of her torticollis including severity, etc. I was prepared to walk out with the summary documents and never see the lady again.  I had not loved her the first time and the exercises were excruciating for LO in that she was sweating and crying a lot.  I figured there had to be a better solution that hopefully would be covered by insurance as this lady ain't cheap.  Sigh, biggest lesson as a mom, don't be judgy. 

She did the exercises with the LO and there was not a peep of discomfort or crying.  LO doesn't like this lady and if she can get her into her exercises and hold it for three minutes than I stand corrected and will see her again.  I had also been a little skeptical that there was a problem until I saw the pictures and diagrams and I realized that the exercises and sleep positioner are important.  There is a whole slice of LO's head that is missing! We also felt that she was only tilted sometimes but she showed us that when LO holds her head straight, her shoulder is up so the tilt is never gone.  She expected LO to make a full recovery and not need a TOT collar or a helmet.  This is the part where I brag as I have been really proud of the LO as there have been a lot of people examining, contorting and poking her and she takes it all really well.  She may squirm a little but she doesn't cry unless they scare her.  She is a tough chick and I love her so much.

Monday morning it was off to get a second opinion at UCLA Pediatric Ophthalmology with all the big deal doctors for her eyes with Poppins.  The offices were impressive and we were treated very well.  LO had to get her eyes dilated again and go through another full exam.  The eye drops sting and she took it pretty well and fell asleep.  She woke up during the exam and was a little freaked out as I was holding her but I don't think she could focus on me as her eyes were very big.  She didn't cry and they did the rest of the exam and we put these cool shades on her.  We are going to watch her eyes as the eyesight in the left one is a little worse and she does have astigmatism but they want to wait before doing any patching or glasses. Good news for the LO! She has a month reprieve on most of her doctor's appointments until she is six months old!

Monday, August 30, 2010

5 Months Old

Sniff, sniff, tear

She is growing so fast!  We walked past the elementary school that I would like for her to attend and I was sad to think of her going to school! I just want to protect her forever.

Friday, August 27, 2010

On Children

When some people look at children, babies especially, they see a fresh start.  They see a person that doesn't know their faults or embarrassments.  They see an extension of their family or themselves. They claim ownership to that child that empowers or validates them.  They think of how that child affects them.  They think the addition of a child makes their clan or tribe stronger.  I hear a whole lot of "them" or "me" when people refer to the LO and it makes me uncomfortable.  As I prepare to go home for a visit and to introduce the LO to everyone, I start to get nervous and prickly skin of the "thems."

I am guilty of being upset when she doesn't want to cuddle or forcing her into a cute outfit for my benefit. Sometimes we all need a reminder that our children do represent a fresh start but the fresh start is theirs, not our own.  We do not possess them nor do they have a responsibility to represent what is lacking in our lives.  The LO at the tender age of five months has her own personality, demeanor and opinion. If you are too wrapped up in yourself, you may miss what she has to say.

I am reminded of an amazing poem that Polka Dot Hippo posted that I copied below.

On Children
Kahlil Gibran

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,

And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.

Mommy To Be Advice



I use "advice" loosely and I speak only from my limited experience.  When I was pregnant it was hard to imagine the baby arriving and what I would need to accommodate and care for her beyond the basic crib.  I took a lot of time on my registry and was almost offended when people veered off the list.  Sometimes it pays to not be as picky as some of the best items that were lifesavers were not on the registry.  I thought I would do a round-up of the most useful newborn items.

Under The Nile Swaddle Blankets BlueSwaddle blankets
Everyone buys the Carters 4 packs and the Aden & Anais 4 packs. The Carters 4 packs are way too small after the first week and the A&As have way too much material at first.  You can find plenty of uses for the A&As as they are the "must have" blanket and are nice to throw over the stroller or car seat.  What really worked well for us was the Under the Nile blankets.  They get a little fuzzy when you wash them so they stay in place.  They are a good weight and very stretchy.  We used these until she was way too big and I can't give them up as I remember how good they were to us.

Kimono style onesies and shirts
We were terrified of LO when she was born and it seemed so much easier to put her in something that didn't need to go over her head. The shirts were useful until the belly button thingie fell off and the long sleeved onesies worked well after.

Little Tummies
We were so worried the first time she had gas and was screaming.  Little Tummies worked like a champ and now I give it every night before bed.  No one should have to be awake because of gas! I should mention that she gets bad gas and I don't just dose her for the heck of it.

Big Hooded Towels
The little thin dinky 2 pack of towels that everyone receives from Babies R Us are too small and they outgrow them fast.  LO didn't like the bath at first so it was extra traumatic if she was cold.

Nosefrida The Snotsucker Nasal AspiratorHumidifier
I didn't receive a humidifier as a gift but should have bought one as I was not prepared for the first time LO got sick.  It was hard to imagine her getting sick so I didn't have any supplies.  I did a review of a great humidifier. You will also need saline drops, Little Noses is a good one and a Nose Frieda.



Fisher-Price Precious Planet Snow Globe & Lights BouncerBouncy Seat
I was convinced that LO would love the swing and there would be no need for a bouncy seat.  She hated the swing and loves the bouncy seat.  Fisher Price makes the best one that vibrates and plays horrible music.  She can't get enough.  She can even hit the whale and play the music herself which she does over and over again.



Luna Lullaby Bosom Baby Nursing Pillow - Ivory DotOne thing that I wish I had was a Bosom Baby pillow instead of the Boppy.  They are larger and you can manipulate them better than the Boppy.  It is too late now as we have two Boppys and we are almost past using a pillow to feed her.


I have a love/hate relationship with Pottery Barn as I am appalled by their prices but love their products.  We received a crib sheet made of "plush chamois" from Pottery Barn that I thought would be nice during winter but I had 5 regular crib sheets that I planned to use.  We use the chamois sheet every night as it feels like a lovey against her skin. 

Swisspers Facial Cleansing Pads 50 eaLastly, we didn't use wipes for the first six weeks.  I would have told you that we would use wipes immediately but her skin was so sensitive.  We used these large square facial cleansing pads.

Items that were never used:
Mittens
Newborn & 3 month footie pjs
Newborn bibs
Newborn hats
Bulb aspirator
Fancy newborn outfits
Bottle warmer
Wipe warmer


Thursday, August 26, 2010

Princess Smackdown

Princess culture turning girls into overspending narcissists

http://www.vancouversun.com/life/Princess+culture+turning+girls+into+overspending+narcissists/3403856/story.html

Sigh, Gulp

I love LO with all my heart but she is very independent.  When I say "but" I mean that I am happy but I thought I would get a little more cuddle time. My plans to have her self soothe and sleep in her own bed from the start have worked out a little too well.  She doesn't want to fall asleep in my arms or cuddle.  She wants to be fed and put in her bed.  She is only five months old, why is she acting 13? She doesn't want to be held unless you are reading a book and she has to turn the pages.  She will also let you hold her if you are in the bathroom holding her up to a mirror so she can look at herself and she is only interested in pictures that have her close-up in them.

I held one of LO's friends a few weeks ago and she was so cuddly and huggy.  LO never hugs or melts against you and closeness is for pulling hair or tugging on your face.  I must admit that I am not much of a cuddler but I thought I would have a little more lovey time with her. I remember that I hated people loving on me when I was little and thought it was great when I was old enough not to have to hug/kiss everyone.  She may look like DH but she seems to have my independent streak.

Her sleeping seems to have evened out and she is sleeping through the night or waking up once. She probably wants to avoid being held in the middle of the night.  I'm delighted that she is feeling good and can breathe well enough to sleep but could she throw me a few hugs when she is awake??

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Early Reading in Children

Burn the books, your children need you to "get them" to avoid being a mass murderer.

http://rewireyourbrainforlove.com/why-early-reading-is-bad-for-your-child-early-brain-development/

Book Review

In honor of the movie release, Eat, Pray, Love, I thought I would review all the best selling books that I read and was supposed to love but didn't.

Eat, Pray, Love - I was sooooo bored and didn't care if she made it out alive.  I tried and tried as so many people loved the book but I could not get into this book.  I couldn't even finish it and that is saying something.

The Help - (Kathryn Stockett) This book did not enlighten me or feel like a "new classic."  The characters were boring and stereotypical. I finished it but was uninspired.  I am surprised by how many people ask if I have read the book.  What am I missing?

The Namesake (Jhumpa Lahiri) I could not connect with any of the characters and it just made me feel blah.  It was just a book I read similar to a mystery sold at the snack shop in an airport when your plane is delayed.

Olive Kitteridge (Elizabeth Strout) This book was a lot of complaining about life and that it sucks to age.  Yeah, I kind of already guessed that.

Snow Flower and the Secret Fan (Lisa See) My best friend told me that she cried throughout this book as it was so moving.  I have tried several times to read it and could not get through it.  I want to love it but I can't.

What do you think of these books? Any other bestsellers that I am missing that miss the mark??

Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman's Search for Everything Across Italy, India and IndonesiaThe Help

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Hard Knock Life

I got home yesterday and the LO was hanging out with her patch eye and bum hand. It was extremely cute and a little sad at the same time.  They eye patches are very fashion forward.  We went to see the pediatrician this am as a follow-up to see how the finger was healing and it is going to be fine.  No need to wear a taped sock today.  We also checked on the patch and she saw the slight strabismus (a condition where your eyes don't look toward the same object together).

She wanted a second opinion on eyes from a doctor within UCLA before starting patching so we are going to see a new doctor and get a second opinion.  We are also going to go to our physical therapist one more time to get her extensive evaluation and then try UCLA PT as well.  We agreed that the PT was a little aggressive and should get another take on the torticollis.

Here are some more pics from the weekend!

Hanging with friends


Monday, August 23, 2010

The Good, The Bad & The Ugly

Friday was not a good day for the LO.  We went to a new ENT at UCLA.  Our new pediatrician is with UCLA and she prefers for the specialist to be within UCLA.  When I had called our old ENT, she suggested this ENT as well as she is even more specialized than the others.  I was hoping to beg off another scope by presenting our old scope results but the doctor would not be deterred.  Poppins had to leave the room when she saw the scope and I don't blame her.  It is really heart-breaking and she gets so sad.  The doctor decided that she would need to go another six months with the medication.  There had been some hope that we could stop at six months but that is not the case.  Unfortunately, we have to go back in two months for a follow-up visit. 

After that traumatic visit, we were off to the eye doctor as I had noticed one of her eyes looked like it was crossing and could explain the torticollis so it needed to be checked out.  She had to get her eyes dilated which is another traumatic experience and then an exam.  I was feeling bad as the eye doctor marked the fourth doctor visit in one week! The doctor gave her a patch for her eye-so sad! She also wants us to try and allergen-proof her bedroom as she saw some irritation in her eyes that would explain why she is always grabbing her eyeball. 

So we went home and were playing for a few minutes before her bath and I cut off the tip of her finger when I was trying to cut her nails!! There was so much blood that I had to fight back the nausea and hysteria that was brewing at the surface.  I called DH to come home in case I passed out.  After two hours we still could not stop the blood so we were off to Urgent Care.  They were very nice but LO screamed for a long time as they put silver nitrate on her finger to stop the blood.  It was such a sad scene that I am still sick to my tummy.  She was in her white footie pjs with duck feet sweating and crying.  We were finally released and we held her the entire night as she couldn't put her finger in her mouth.  She was not too pleased as she wanted to be in her bed away from us.

All weekend she was spitting up and had a lot of tummy problems so I felt even worse for her.  I think all the screaming made her reflux aggravated and she was so uncomfortable.  DH and I kept telling her how braved she acted but I think that she was just pissed.  On Saturday we went to a picnic with our Mommy & Me friends that was a lot of fun but LO just didn't feel well.  We also had our last class of Mommy & Me for this session.  You know what that means~a new video!

The weekend ended well as DH planned a family outing to a small children's museum!  It was only two small floors and it was really sweet.  They had a huge pinball machine and a water table that LO loved.  It was a great family outing and I was impressed that he took the time to plan it.  She was so excited to see Poppins this am.  Hmmmmmmm, wonder why??

Friday, August 20, 2010

Suck it!

My favorite comedian/reality star is Kathy Griffin. She doesn't care what people think and makes her fortune from pissing people off.  Wow, doesn't that sound awesome? I have received three lectures this week from various people on where I am falling short with my child, my family and my workout routine.  Really??  In my mind, I scream, "No s**t Sherlock, do you think I don't know that I am failing??" Unfortunately in the depths of my soul I battle being a people pleaser.  I try to hide it but it makes me sad when I don't do a good job or please everyone.  This character trait sets me up for failure ALL the time as everyone knows that most people can't be pleased.

I was undergoing a painful elective beauty treatment yesterday and they gave me a little too much numbing cream and I got to thinking.  Side note, topical numbing is like being drunk for only the sad, depressing part that hits around 2 am, gives you a headache and makes you hungry.  My first thought was why the heck am I doing a painful beauty treatment in the three hours I have to myself in the week?  Then I reminded myself that I paid for a three pack and I absolutely can't waste money. 

I ran away from my hometown at 18 as I could barely take the pressure one more day of so many expectations.  When I say ran, I mean I went to college and never looked back. I didn't grab my guitar and hop on a bus in a jean dress and cowboy boots headed for Hollywood.  I love my family but I couldn't take it anymore.  I still fight feeling suffocated and the pressure.  I feel like I always fall short on pleasing all of them.  It was not one particular person, well some more than others.  And no this is not one of those crazy my mom pressured me to be skinny things.  She actually tries the hardest to respect my feelings. 

I find myself gravitating towards people that don't expect a ton from me.  I'm there for you in a crisis but I am not the person who will call you back immediately.  I just listened to my phone messages from July! I had some time yesterday and decided to listen to them.  It is not that I don't care or that I am not thinking of you.  I work hard all day, get my baby ready for bed and then mumble incoherently with DH for an hour and fall into bed. We all have heard what happens in the night at our house.  The weekends are filled with baby stuff and getting ready for the next week and maybe catching a nap.

So what is my point?? I am going to shout it from the rooftops right now, "I'm sorry." I'm sorry that I suck, I'm sorry that I don't call back within a reasonable amount of time, I'm sorry that your birthday card didn't get sent, I'm sorry that I can't get a workout in every day by lifting the baby for my arm curls, I'm sorry that I am not as aggressive with her exercises in the short 30 minutes before bath, bottle and bed, I'm sorry for past transgressions, present offenses and all my shortcomings in the future.  But if you aren't careful, next time I may tell you to "Suck it!"

Pull A Scarf

LO has been really digging the Pull a Scarf toy that I bought from Lakeshore Learning.  I thought it was a little pricey but she loves playing with the scarves as they are different textures and bright colors.  I have already washed them and they hold up well.  She is not as interested in the box but it is a great place to store the scarves and I think she will like it in a few months.  I heard about Lakeshore Learning from a teacher friend and they have lots of great durable items.  There is a location close to us but I have not been able to get over there.

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Blah, Eh, Wah

I have started three different blog posts on "fascinating" subjects and I am finding it hard to finish them as they are such hot topics for me.  I'm also having a hard time concentrating so I find myself surfing the web looking to buy clothes for me or the LO.  There are a lot of great deals out there that make it difficult to concentrate.

J. Crew 30% off final sale/free shipping Code: SHOPNOW
Revolve Clothing 20% off site Code: INSTYLE20
Pottery Barn Kids Free Shipping on their adorable treat bags
Hautelook has awesome high chairs on sale in the exact style/color that I wanted
Old Navy 30% off today/25% off tomorrow/20% off Saturday/Free Shipping Code: ONFALL

LO is not sleeping again and I am going to go to a new ENT on Monday and they are going to scope her again! Uggggggg! I feel so bad for her and I know that the reflux/breathing is causing the torticollis.  The sleep positioner has not been working well for us as she fights it and can't sleep.  The cranio facial doctor gave me a lecture yesterday about being a parent.  He basically said, "Suck it up and do the exercises or your daughter is going to be in a world of hurt, biatch."  I may be paraphrasing a bit. 

LO hates the exercises and is surprisingly strong and aggressive. She has a mean right hook that shows no mercy.  It is easy for me during the day to reason that we have to put her in the postioner to sleep but hard when she is waking up hourly.  Oh well, tonight is another night and I will try again.  I am also making her do the exercises as it seems kind of lame that I would let a 4 month old take advantage of me.  The only thing I can say in my defense is she wears monkeys on her pjs and there are monkey heads on the feet.  It is just hard to be tough when she looks so damn cute!

I rely on Poppins to do the majority of the exercises as she is home with her especially during her happy and calm times. It makes me doubly happy that we have her as I trust that she will do the exercises and how would we have worked that into the schedule at daycare?! As the doctors talk about time frames for the torticollis and reflux, I am beginning to doubt that she will be able to go to daycare at one year. I hope that she doesn't turn into a socially inept kid that bites and pulls out her eyebrows instead of making friends.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Kangaroo

LO's Halloween costume arrived in the mail from grandma! It is pretty cute and I can't wait for her to wear it.  I would try it on her if it ever gets a little cooler!

Whoa, Dude

I think I may have programmed my URL to point to my blog so now you don't have to type in blogspot, just http://www.iheartchocolatecake.com/.  You still need the www as I was a little unclear on that part of the programming. Hmmppphhh....

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Random Stuff

I'm trying to improve my depressing post to celebratory post ratio for my blog so I thought I would upload a few recent pics!

We attended Squishy's b-day party this past weekend which was a lot of fun! There was not one picture that was good of all four of us out of the 25 that DH took. He may be fired as the photographer. I thought this was funny as it looks like the babies are sizing up the competition for outfits, attention, etc.













LO tried using a sippy cup for the first time which was fun and a great way for her to stay cool in the heat.

















Earlier in the weekend, I tried to be creative a la Mila's Daydreams and failed miserably as my baby was awake and eating the raw materials.  My fortune will have to be made in a different way.
























Lastly, we have two other beings that live with us that would gladly come live with you these days, not that you offered.











Carl Hiaasen - Star Island

Skinny DipStar IslandCarl Hiassen is an amazing writer who focuses on Florida, corruption, evil land developers and wackadoodles.  His books are fast-moving and filled with sarcasm.  I have read all of his books and loved them.  I even read his books for children.  He is one of the only authors that I will buy the hard cover book without even looking at the summary page.  So, did I set myself up for disappointment or was Star Island mediocre? It had all the trappings to be ridiculously good but it seemed like recycled material with no panache.  I would recommend Skinny Dip by Carl Hiaasen as a much better portrayal of his work.

From Publishers Weekly
The career of singer Cheryl Bunterman (aka Cherry Pye), who debuted with JailbaitHiaasen (Nature Girl). Among those struggling to keep Cherry's career afloat are her mother, Janet Bunterman; producer Maury Lykes; and "undercover stunt double" Ann DeLusia, who will, say, mislead the press into thinking Cherry is out and about when she's really in rehab. Hiaasen has easy targets in misbehaving celebrity sightings, tabloid stalkings, and spin control experts, and he makes the most of them. Crooked real estate developer Jackie Sebago and paparazzo Bang Abbott, who plans to hitch his wagon to Cherry's star, add to the madcap fun. Mayhem follows after Bang kidnaps Ann instead of Cherry by mistake, and ex-Florida governor and eco-vigilante Clinton "Skink" Tyree, who was smitten with Ann after a chance encounter, rushes to her rescue. The torrent of pop culture barbs are bound to please Hiaasen's ardent fans.  Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

3 out of 5 stars

Monday, August 16, 2010

Torticollis Awesomeness

I ran into some bad sushi for lunch on Friday and I feel that has been defining the last few weeks.  Even pleasurable things like sushi for lunch have been kicking my ass.  We were almost to a good place with the LO's sleeping in that she went back to sleep after a little rocking when she was waking up three or four times a night. The doctor suggested putting her to sleep on her stomach!  DH and I had a long conversation to decide if we were comfortable with tummy sleeping and tried it for a nap.  She burped and then spit up a lot so we decided that it wasn't for us and put her to sleep on her side and that was working. 

This am Poppins, DH and I visited the physical therapist and she wants to put her in a sleep positioner at a slight angle underneath her armpits for the torticollis!  In addition, to the awesome sleep positioner there was a lot of tummy time and exercises that confused my tired brain.  LO responded by screaming a lot and then passing out on the floor.  I wanted to curl up next to her and let the adults figure out the rest. 

Kiddopotamus Cradler Adjustable Head Support for Newborns to Toddlers, Navy Puppy.We left the appointment and went to the nearby Babies R Us to pick up the positioner as well as the head supports for the car seat and stroller.  Although our girl will not be sporting a helmet or brace at this time she will be wedged into these awesome cradlers while awake.  If you feel that this is overkill, they show you enough deformed children pictures to scare you straight.  I'm not going to say who but one of us was in tears when they saw the pics.  Also, there is only a small window of opportunity to fix the tilt before the LO becomes more mobile and her bones fuse together on her head. In response to the new regimen she had explosive poo all over the back of my car to acknowledge her excitement.

Friday, August 13, 2010

No Sleep Till Brooklyn

If you are thinking to yourself that you are going to stop reading my blog if I mention sleep one more time, I don't blame you.  This may be my last blog post on sleep.  It is with a heavy heart that I tell you that I have figured out the problem as it makes me so sad. Turns out she is not a vindictive monster who is trying to age me at a rapid rate. 

She can't breathe and swallow when she is on her back so sleeping is tough.  She is exhausted and wants to sleep upright again.  I'm scared that is the only way that she is going to be able to sleep.  Her laryngomalacia is getting worse which is normal between four and six months so her reflux is a little worse and it sounds like she has a head cold all the time.  I stayed awake when she was sleeping on her back last night and waited and I saw her struggling in her sleep to open up her throat by throwing her neck and head back.  This is probably the reason for the awesome torticollis as well. 

I am at a loss as my awesome friend the Nap Nanny is no longer a possibility and elevating the bed is not working.  I am assuming that we will just hold her for the next few months so she can sleep?? I have calls into her ENT and pediatrician but I can't imagine that they will have a great solution that has not been raised before. What to do? What to do?

Happy Birthday, Squishy!

Congratulations on a year of parenting to two of the funniest people! May every year be as memorable.


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Thursday, August 12, 2010

Clueless

I feel that I am above average in intelligence meaning I can dress and feed myself with some degree of success.  I have access to above average information and health care.  Although wacky, my family is loving and supportive.  My husband treats me with respect and love.  I feel pretty lucky. With all of this going for me, you would think that I would have a little more of a clue when it comes to parenting.  Some days I feel like the best I can do is pull a random idea out and see if it works.  How is that "mindful mothering" or parenting with a plan???  I had big plans and ideas before I became a parent, "Eh, let's give it a try," was not part of the plan!

Last night, I went home to see the LO and was hesitant as I was feeling really lost with this no sleep thing.  The night before I had let her cry/scream for 10 minutes and I didn't like it but she had exhausted herself and gone to sleep.  It had not worked for the night as she was up multiple times anyway.  So last night, I decided to try it again as the pediatrician had recommended it.  LO had always had herself a good cry after the bath almost a breakdown of her frustrations for the day so I believed a little bit in needing to let go and relax.

The difference in last night was that DH was there.  It somehow made it worse that there was a witness to my "cruelty." Even thought the monitor was on silent we could hear her screaming and I started crying along with her.  I went upstairs after 10 minutes as I couldn't make it to 15 minutes which is what the pediatrician recommended and I calmed her down and she went right to sleep.  She was sweating and having trouble breathing and I felt terrible.  I was miserable the rest of the night and I am tearing up as I write this post.  She slept until 4 am when she got tangled up in the crib and I held her for a few minutes and then she went back to sleep. 

I am not comfortable with crying it out as I wanted to wait until six months to try any sleep training or five months if we were desperate.  I kind of fell into it from pure frustration and exhaustion.  I regret it but know I will have to continue to stay consistent and not send confusing messages.  On the other hand if I had not slept last night would I be thinking about going to 15 minutes?

I also feel that it was my responsibility to come up with a plan for our family.  Was I acting like I was not open to ideas from DH or did he assume that I would take care of it? I wonder if we put more responsibility on ourselves as women and should let the men step up?  That leads to the second part of my post and if you are still reading god love ya.

Squishy's mom has a work trip in February for nine days and she feels that she has to take Squishy with her as her DH won't be able to handle it.  I left her a message advising her to leave Squishy as she will be so busy and that her DH can handle it, blah, blah, blah.  I think I annoyed her and she challenged me by saying that I wouldn't leave LO with DH.  So I thought about it and I decided to tell DH that I had a work trip in February for a week which is actually very possible as I usually do travel at that time of year and it is usually for a week.  He agreed that I couldn't take the LO with me but he would need extra help and someone would have to step up or be hired.  While I was happy that he had agreed that LO would need to stay with him, I found it slightly humorous that a person would need to be hired to help him.  We all left the hospital with the same limited knowledge of parenting and caring for babies, where and when did the great divide happen? Is maternity leave to blame? Do we bring it on ourselves by not pushing more? Or do we believe that our children are not safe with our spouses? How do we stop the divide before it comes between us?

Cousins

LO and I had a chance to hang with our girl cousins last week. We took pics as it is not very often that everyone is together.  We had a great time and the LO was in a good mood.

LO is wearing her pjs as it was late and I didn't know there would be pics. What makes it more embarrassing is that she drooled all over herself so she appears wet in all the pics. I have given up on myself but at least I could throw a cute outfit on the LO. I hope that I don't turn into one of those people that let their kids go diapers only in Target. 

I think we all look somewhat alike and I am hoping that the LO grows up to look more like me/my family as I am not seeing much of a resemblance these days.