Thursday, July 29, 2010

Daddy, Why is Mommy So Mean?

I love being a mom and all that comes with the responsibility.  I would do absolutely anything for the LO and give her everything that she ever wanted.  Unfortunately, being a responsible parent means setting limits, not giving in and sometimes being "mean." Mommys make the doctor appointments for vaccinations, look ahead to the next milestone, administer medication and say no.  After two nights with no sleep, I was wavering on getting rid of the Nap Nanny.  I felt "mean" for getting rid of a product that helped her breathe and sleep better.  Why was I torturing her and myself when we could all get sleep so easily?

I called Squishy's mom (Squishy is LO's BF) and she reminded me that the Nap Nanny was dangerous especially for someone who had a hard time breathing and we needed to kick the habit.  She also reminded me that sometimes you have to let the other parent do some parenting even if it is different from your way EVEN if it makes the transition take longer.  I am sometimes a bit stubborn and will not give in until I physically break down.  I had been doing all of the night wakings myself as I was afraid that DH would just hold her or use the NN.

So last night, I gave LO her bath and started to give her the last bottle and she fell right to sleep much like the night before but I kept pushing to bottle so I could avoid night feeding or limit it to once in the middle of the night.  I tried waking her up so I could put her down drowsy so she was not startled when she woke up but she was passed out.  I put her down, she started moving and was in a light sleep.  DH was making some noise in the kitchen and I broke down.  I decided to let him have the monitor and go to bed at 7:30 even though we had a special night planned for the two of us.  I was frustrated, sad and feeling really low. 

She woke up at 8 and DH went in and I had to just keep myself in bed and let him do some parenting.  This is VERY hard for me.  He went in and did a great job and got her to go to sleep with no nap nanny and no swaddle.  She woke up again at 10:30 but I went in and rubbed her tummy for a minute and she went back to sleep until I woke her up at 6:45 am.  She woke up a little earlier but was in her crib talking to herself and chewing her fingers.  We were all well rested and the day a little shinier! She may be up tonight again but I saw the light at the end of the tunnel and I realized that sometimes you have to let daddy do some of the mean stuff too.